These songs we sing along to – what do they mean?

What exactly are we humming? And what point are the songwriters trying to make?

Usually, I have no idea. Heck, I thought Neil Diamond was singing about some guy named “Reverend Eugene,” – not “Forever in Blue Jeans.”

Curious – okay, bored – I decided to dig up the lyrics to a song which I have never understood and whose meaning always baffled me – Elton John’s “Levon.”

Below, in italics, are the lyrics to “Levon,” written by John and Bernie

Taupin, for us to examine:

Levon wears his war wound like a crown

He calls his child Jesus

‘Cause he likes the name

And he sends him to the finest school in town

Okay, so this Levon fellow was in a war. He names his son Jesus, and he sends him to a private school. That makes sense, although I wouldn’t name a child Jesus. That’s asking for trouble. Every time someone stubs their toe and yells “Jesus!,” this kid is going to be jumping out of his drawers. And he’s liable to get the big head, thinking all those hymns are about him.

Levon, Levon likes his money He makes a lot they say

Spends his days counting

In a garage by the motorway

Okay, so Levon is rich, and doesn’t have an accountant. Got it.

He was born a pauper to a pawn on a Christmas Day

When the New York Times said God is dead

And the wars begun

Alvin Tostig has a son today

This is where the confusion sets in. So, Levon is born on Christmas Day. And then the New York Times, on Christmas Day, said God is dead, which started wars? Actually, German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche said “God is dead,” – back in something like 1890 (I had to look it up). And it didn’t start any wars.

And who is Alvin Tostig? Levon’s father, I’m left to assume. So Jesus’ name is Jesus Tostig? Urgh.

And he shall be Levon

And he shall be a good man

And he shall be Levon

In tradition with the family plan

And he shall be Levon

And he shall be a good man

He shall be Levon

Enough already. We’ll call him Levon.

Levon sells cartoon balloons in town

His family business thrives

Jesus blows up balloons all day

Sits on the porch swing watching them fly

Wait, I thought Levon was supposed to be rich? Selling cartoon balloons? I can understand being wealthy if you were a cartoon balloon manufacturer, but this Levon guy just sells them. Is there really that big a market for balloons shaped like Daffy Duck? And his kid blows the balloons up and lets them fly off. How is Levon making a profit?

And Jesus, he wants to go to Venus

Leaving Levon far behind

Take a balloon and go sailing

While Levon, Levon slowly dies

So, apparently, Jesus doesn’t like Levon too much, seeing as how he wants to leave him behind to slowly die. But why does he want to fly a balloon to, of all places, Venus? From what I hear, it’s very cold there. I guess the songwriting decision came down to:

What rhymes with Jesus? Panama City – nope. Vegas, nah. How bout Venus?

There you go.

While the song doesn’t indicate if Levon is cruel or mean, it does give us one clue as to why Levon wouldn’t be held in such high regard by his son – he named him Jesus Tostig! If he would have named him Ted or Earl or Skip, the kid would probably love his father and wouldn’t let all those balloons go flying off.

The point of the song? What does “Levon” tell us? Hmm, I’ve narrowed it down to two possible themes:

1. Don’t name your son Jesus Tostig. He’ll hate you.

2. Elton John and Bernie Taupin were on dope.

You make you own determination. I’m leaning heavily toward 2.



Len Robbins is the editor/publisher of The Clinch County News.