I watch “The Bachelor,” and not because anyone else at my house watches the show and I just happen to be in the room. I watch “The Bachelor” because I enjoy it, and it is a total escape from reality. I tried watching “The Bachelorette,” but it just reminded me too much of high school. A bunch of guys going after one beautiful woman is much more believable than a bunch of women going after one handsome man. Even in these modern times, one of the gender roles that has remained rather constant has been that men are expected to pursue the woman they are interested in.

One of the reasons I am a willing “Bachelor” viewer is the advent of the DVR. I probably would not be watching the show if it really took an hour or two out of my week. There are parts of the show that are very repetitive and drawn out for the purpose of creating more anticipation, and to make what should realistically last six episodes create enough material for 12. One of the parts of the show that I always fast forward through is the rose ceremony that occurs near the end of every episode. This is where our extremely lucky guy, who is placed into a situation that would never occur in real life, gets to decide who will remain on the show and get to chase after him for another week.

This season of “The Bachelor” was hard for me to watch, but I am glad I stuck it out ‘til the end because the ending of this season was way different and more entertaining than all of the others. Colton Underwood was the lucky guy on this season, but I was already not a big fan of his. I occasionally also watch the spin-off show called “Bachelor in Paradise”, where the ABC network takes all of the losers from the seasons of “The Bachelor” and “Bachelorette” and sees if any of them would like to hitch up. Colton was one of those losers from “The Bachelorette.” He seemed a bit shallow and sappy to me. So the guy that couldn’t find love on “The Bachelorette” or “Bachelor in Paradise” was given a third try.

If you have this season of “The Bachelor” recorded and are just a couple weeks behind, STOP READING NOW. I am going to spoil “The Bachelor” finale that all of the show’s fans have been waiting for. On this season, the woman the Bachelor wanted to end up with at the end, Cassie Randolph, said she didn’t want to stick around anymore because she was not sure she could make a life-long commitment to Colton. Then, Colton did what no Bachelor before him has done. He said, “I quit.” He jumped over a fence at the resort where filming was taking place, and escaped into the night. Watching the film crew and producers search for Colton was very much like watching an episode of “Cops.”

They eventually catch up to him, and are able to convince him to let them record his breakups with the other two contestants who were still in “the game” at this point. They also agree to let him try to plead with Cassie to not break up with him before she had a chance to get on her escape flight. Well, to Colton’s and America’s surprise, Cassie does agree to let him be her boyfriend, but she is still not ready for an engagement ring. I was so happy for that sappy loser, I even cried a little bit. Not like I did when my grandparents died or at the end of Carlito’s Way, but it did make some water leave my eye.

Please understand if you see me in public, I won’t ever want to talk about “The Bachelor.” I would much rather talk about the hunting, fishing, and other macho stuff I frequently write about. I might even pretend I have no idea why anyone would ever watch such trash.

Eric lives in Suwannee County and is a public school educator. He is an independent contractor. You can reach him at miamistyle8@gmail.com.